Damini and our mindset...

Yesterday one of my junior sent me a message on Facebook expressing her agony  describing some of her personal experiences along with a serious question,

"Dada, can't we do something so that we can feel somewhat more secure? What if I'm the next Damini?"

I've not been able to reply her till now.. What should I say? Can I assure her for sure that she would never face such a situation? She has sent me the message in good faith, but actually alone I'm nobody.. All across India, the situation is the same.. Girls can never feel secured.. and the reason? the perverted males and our mindset as a whole..

You see, most of you most probably remember the incident here in Guwahati in July 2012, which shook the whole world.. One teenage girl was molested publicly on the busy G.S.Road at around 9.30 pm and almost everyone present on the scene were just silent spectators..  Now once again even less than 6 months of that said incident, a 23 years old girl was brutally raped and murdered in the most barbaric way, and that too again in India.. Until and unless there are some stringent laws against these offences, these will just continue.. The ideal one what I would advocate here is nothing but the capital punishment. It seems cruel, but right at this moment I feel the punishment offered in Saudi Arabia and some other countries are appropriate for such kind of crimes!! I won't say that just enforcing some tough punishments will bring the total numbers of these crimes to zero, but in our society, where the number of perverts exceeds far far more than that of good people, it can be hoped that the fear for losing one's life as punishment will reduce these crimes to a significant level.

We all agree that respect can't be taken, its acquired or gained.. But if you don't get the 'deserved' respect, then be sure that you are amongst some people who are illiterate enough to pay respect or they are ignorant of your value.. Ignorance can be overcome by awareness and proper counselling. but how to deal with the mindset which are just not willing to pay you the due respect? It calls for a change.. The change in the brought up, the change in the teaching and overall the change in the mindset of our people.. In our Indian culture, we pray so many goddesses, yet the crime against females are yet too high here.. pathetic!!! We all feel sympathy for any rape victim, but very few will be willing to include that survivor as a new family member. There are some families where the kids from the very beginning witness the females to be dominated, tortured and used, and their thinking develops accordingly... Most of our women are also used to be being used or tortured and yet still instead of teaching their sons to respect women, most of them expect their daughters to follow their footsteps without fail.. After all "PATI PARAMESHWAR"!!! Thats our mindset!!!

Go through national newspapers..Quite often it is seen that after a girl child is raped, she is expelled from her school because other children don't feel comfortable to study with her.. Question yourself.. does other children really have that feeling of discomfort? actually not.. these feeling have been infused by their parents.. but these same parents expect other parents to have sympathy in case their own innocent child suffers the same. Thats our mindset!!!

Everybody is against rape, but whenever someone comes forward to marry a known rape survivor, it becomes the talk of the town.. the boy becomes a 'Mahapurush', even though he wanted to be a normal guy expecting a normal marriage... and the girl once again becomes the thing to feel pity for. Thats our mentality!!!

That means the survivor gets lifetime mental torture free of cost for the crime she didn't commit.. and the real culprit just escape unnoticed in most of the cases.. and even if the real culprit gets arrested, there are so many loopholes in our judiciary system that because of money and manpower, by using some well known advocates, some of them yet get least possible punishment..

About stringent punishment against these offences, we can raise our voices and make the government aware of our demands.. They are the law makers and they are expected to act on behalf of the public!! But above all the most important thing that we can do is to change our mindset..

When your innerwear becomes visible after someone forcefully tears your decent dress, most of us will eventually forget about the causal incident, but obviously raise questions regarding your motive or dress sense!! and some would even try to take a chance to touch and feel those exposed parts!! Thats our mindset!!

So wake up guys and grow up!!! Try to change the law and most importantly change our mindset!!!