Charity or Showoff???

That day one of my close friend said to me, "Partha, it seems you like to show off a lot !!!"

I asked him, "Why?"

He said, "You never upload when you do something wrong... But whenever you do something good, you let know the whole world by updating a blog on Facebook... Even you never miss to upload a photograph when u donate blood... It's good that u try to help others by your small steps, but what I think is that charity should be silent !!!"

I smiled and answered diplomatically, "Actually (my friend), it depends how you accept certain things..!! and at my level, uploading my wrong doings might not serve any purpose..."

He didn't say anything else... Anyway, only a good friend can criticize you in this way...

Coming to my viewpoint, I personally strongly believe that charity 'looks' better if it is done silently, but it 'works' better if you can motivate others to do the same!!! And today I am going to cite you two examples related to my Facebook updates...

EXAMPLE NO. 1:

That day one of my junior called me.. He has recently joined as a Senior Resident in AIIMS, New Delhi after completing his Post Graduation from GMCH, Guwahati. He was here at Guwahati for a few days to complete some of the official formalities. He wanted to donate blood.

He said, " Partha da, I've already donated blood for three times till now... But your updates and photographs increased my desire even more... Thought it would be good to donate once again before I leave Assam..."

Later I noticed him uploading his photograph of blood donation on Facebook... I think his photograph with his bright smile rightfully expressed his pleasure and it'll influence at least some of his friends to come forward to do the same !!!

EXAMPLE NO. 2:

Today at around 12.15 pm one of my junior Prachyajyoti Bora came to meet me. He had noticed one mentally challenged old lady lying near GMCH in a too critical condition.. The human being inside this young boy felt the strong urge to help the poor lady..

What he said just filled my heart...

"Actually Partha da, recently I had read your update titled "I am a disco dancer" and thus it came to my mind that you would be the right person to approach..."

And you know what... With the help of some of his friends like Dipangkar Das and others and our medical college authority, that lady was later admitted at our institute. Now the lady will get the proper medical attention she deserves. In the meantime I am going to seek help of some NGOs if they can somehow take her responsibility.. Otherwise once discharged, she will again return to the same unhygienic condition....

Well done Prachya and friends... We all are proud of you...

We all need each other...

Months back I had updated a status titled, "Humanity lost: Lady's seat...", in which I described an incident where a husband forced a very weak old man, who was occupying a lady's seat to leave his seat to his wife... Probably some of my friends still remember it...

Now let me describe you another experience...

That day I was once again coming from Bhangagarh to Khanapara, Guwahati in a city bus after finishing my duty at GMCH.. Actually I had to come to my hometown Morigaon... Ok, the city bus was not at all crowded... I was in the last row of seats and leaving aside some of the lady's seats, all other seats were occupied... In the next stoppage one old man got into the bus and he directly stood in front of me... He could have taken a vacant seat meant for the ladies, but he was just reluctant to do so.. May be he already had some bitter experiences... Ok, in the next stoppage the seats were filled up and the bus became somewhat crowded...

I said to the old man, "Uncle, you may sit here!" and left my seat...

Next came the problem... My bag was somewhat heavy and I faced trouble in the crowded bus to manage it...

I politely asked that old man, "Uncle, can you kindly hold my bag for sometime on your lap?"

You see... He was sitting in the seat which I was actually occupying, but he flatly denied to hold my bag even for a moment saying, "I am sorry, but I don't know what is in your bag..!!!"

Before I could think about anything, the young boy next to him gladly took my bag with a bright smile and thus he saved me from the feeling of embarrassment...

Somebody rightly said... Most of times the very  aged people once again become a child... No means no, and yes means absolutely yes... :-):-):-) 

Till now I have learnt countless things from my juniors... From this incident I once again learnt this very important thing in life... You know,  age is never a hinder... Even a younger can make us learn a lot simply by his/her action... This young boy, whom I even didn't notice made my moment...

Mark Caine said that any man to whom you can do a favor is your friend, and that you can do a favor to almost anyone..... And I strongly believe that.... Anyway we all need each other.....

I am a disco dancer..!!!

Today I had morning duty at Blood Bank, GMCH. As I was about to leave from my rented house, I saw one lady around 100 metres apart... She was making some movements.. It appeared like she was dancing to the tunes of some music and that too by the side of a public road !! While I was crossing her, I slowed down my speed to some extent and watched her carefully taking utmost care not to embarrass her in any way... But she was totally indifferent to the surroundings...  She was herself singing the song "I am a disco dancer.." and was dancing to the same tunes... She would be around 40 yrs old.. She was well dressed and from her dresses it appeared like she belongs to a good family and from the prominent vermilion on her forehead I came to know that she is a married woman... Probably she belongs to some family in my neighbourhood as I have seen her a few times before... Even yesterday I had noticed her on the same place near Iskon Temple, Ulubari, Guwahati, singing the same song...

Frankly speaking, I didn't have the courage to approach her at that time on that empty road, moreover it won't serve any reason, but I have every hope that may be there will be someone who will be able to identify this lady by the slightest hint that I have mentioned in this post and thus will notify her family about her condition if they are not already aware of... I am also quite sure that if somebody knows her, then he/she will be careful enough not to reveal her identity here...

You know... Most of us have the hesitation to consult a Psychiatrist even for the most needed conditions of a family member... By acting this way, temporarily we may be "successful" to keep our so called "Family pride" intact, but on long course, knowingly or unknowingly we do huge injustice to our loved ones by denying the necessary medical attention they deserve.. Its really tragic that even in this century psychiatric problems are social stigmas... But do you know what I feel? Personally I feel, somebody might even need lifelong medications, yet like diabetes and hypertension, if someone gets proper treatment and consultation, he or she would be able to lead a normal productive life in most of the psychiatric conditions...

I don't know why, but I was deeply saddened by the scene that I witnessed and thus I am writing this post to convey one bitter truth... If she really has a caring family, she would get proper Psychiatric treatment and soon she would get back to normalcy ... Otherwise there is every possibility that there will be addition of another woman to the whole lot of numerous mentally imbalanced persons whom we quite often encounter roaming pathetically here and there..  Nothing more to say..!!!!

Another form of humanity...

That day I was talking to somebody while having a cup of tea at the veranda of a hotel. Meanwhile the sound of some dogs, which they usually make when they see somebody familiar, drew my attention. There was one middle aged Sister (Nurse) madam with a packet of biscuits in her hand and all the three dogs were looking at her displaying their loyalty by moving their tails in the same rhythm... She opened the packet, which is a big one actually, and started distributing amongst them... And the dogs too started eating the biscuits silently without making any noise... Those who have slightest experience with dogs would readily agree that even when we distribute some foods amongst our pet dogs, there is usually huge noise... But in this case, this madam worked magically... Probably this is her routine activity and thus she has successfully trained these stray dogs to share while taking food... Maybe these dogs  also could well understand that this madam won't let anyone deprive of their part... Everybody will get the due share of the biscuits.... :-):-)

It was an amazing scene to witness... I don't know her, but I have seen her before in GMCH and after  seeing her action that day, I had the intense urge to meet this lady. But when I looked around in search for her, she was out of the scene... Probably after finishing her this duty of humanity she once again became busy with her job responsibilities... 

You know... In this competitive world at the time when we don't get proper time to think beyond our family, this Nurse madam has set a fine example of humanity... Probably it's because of these kinds of people that the world is running smoothly... Hats off to you madam... We have so many things to learn from people like you...

Sati Saavitri .... (সতী সà��বিত্রী ।।)

This Sunday I watched a programme "Ji kom Socha kom" [I'll tell only the truth] @Assamese Channel DY365 anchored by Dr. Akashitora... The guest for the episode was one lady with two little kids whose husband has married for the second time, that too at a time when she was perfectly alive and staying with her husband without a divorce ...

First of all let me clarify something... I've not written this post to judge anybody... Their case is under trial and the law will take its own due course... What I am trying is to highlight some important points...

You see... That lady was wearing Sindur (vermilion) even after she was mercilessly rejected by her husband... What would you say? I just feel pity for the husband !!!Okay, I don't know anything about the reasons for the creation of distance and tension between the two, but I know one thing for sure that if the husband really needs to marry for the second time, they will have to legally separate beforehand...

And what to say about the kids!!! Both kids were present there beside their mother on the sets of the show... And about the little one, you won't have any other option than to adore her... She is around 3yrs old, and when she did sing a few lines of a song, I felt something heavier inside.... I don't understand how a father can leave aside such two kids for another woman... I know... Love is blind, but specifically in this situation this reasoning just lacks any positive aspect... Yet this lady tried to share her husband with an another woman keeping in view of the future of the kids, but somehow she just failed... Personally I can never blame her at least for her inability to cope with her husband's second wife... Really, its not that much easy !!!

Now coming to the society, according to that lady, most of the people from her locality blames her because she couldn't live with her husband's second wife... As informed you earlier, I once again say that I won't even try to judge whether she is speaking the whole or part truth... But personally as a physician, I have witnessed quite a no. of such cases in which the society tries to justify the husband's act eventually making the life of the wife even more complicated..

This is the high time for a change... The concept of "Sati Saavitri" should have been over by now... Such kind of husbands should also learn to be loyal to their wives... But to be true, in a society where a rapist gets the "PUNISHMENT" by some of the "local self proclaimed law makers" to marry the victim, I really don't see much hope for a change...!!!

A nice example..!!!

Today I was waiting at a traffic point for signal. There I noticed two aged persons with grey hairs in their 80's near my car... The lady was holding the gentleman's shoulder... The way they were interacting, it became apparent that most probably they are cousins and they have met each other after a long interval... And by the way in which the gentleman behaved, it was not difficult for me to assume that the lady was his elder cousin... I don't know for how long they were talking, but just before there was green signal at the traffic point, the gentleman touched the feet of the lady...

I was just overwhelmed... It won't be possible for me to know their identity in any way...  Can you imagine? The old man needed one walking stick for his support, yet he didn't fail to pay his sister her due respect.. And what to say about that old lady ... She just unknowingly openly displayed her care by placing her palm over his shoulder...

I am not saying that these are the only ways to show that you care... I am not saying that touching someone's feet is the only way to show that you respect somebody...  There are lots many and when you really care, by this or that way, it somehow gets expressed in most of the times... I have given emphasis on "most of the times", because we can never deny that there are so many people who without even saying or expressing anything just do their part....

You know, I felt honoured to witness such an incident.. And I really believe that indeed it may actually become a very  nice example of brother sister relationship.... In this time when most of us, the young generation have mostly become mechanical in our relationships, these kinds of examples certainly rejuvenate us and we can once again start believing that... Yes, there is still life in this world of concrete.. !!!